bitterSWEET

My wedding day was bittersweet. You might find this strange - weddings evoke images of love and happiness and not tears and heartache...

mine had both.

After 6 years of dating, 2 daschunds, a beautiful home and a huge circle of friends - Nic asked me to marry him on Christmas day 2003. It was a beautiful moment in our own garden, I said yes. We did not want a huge wedding or a long engagement, Nic was completeing his MBA at GIBS, my parents were living in Mozambique, Nic's brother was in Singapore, his sister in London and Claire in the States........so we tried to find a date that would suit everyone - an exercise I will never try to attempt again! Eventually, we set the date as 24th April 2004 and so be it - to me a nice round number with a ring to it!! :) and we decided to get married in a beautiful, special trout fishing town called Dullstroom.

All our friends and family congregated at Dunkeld Country Estate - our wedding venue - on the friday before the wedding.........it was wonderful to see everyone, to all catch up and join in the celebration. My Mom, sisters and aunts all got stuck in with arranging flowers. My bridesmaids pampered and spoilt me and the boys went fishing! A typical South African scenario but a celebration of note.

I was feeling such joy, it was the first time in a long time that I had all my loved ones around me and was especially grateful to see my Gramps. He was known as GGG (Great Grandpa George) and had always been my sane, no-nonsense sage. My grandfather who believed I could do anything and become anything I wanted - he encouraged me to be strong, work hard and believed that all of life's riches would be bestowed upon me. He had a wicked dry sense of humour, was an absolute stoic who never complained about anything and a damn stubborn Scotsman to boot as well. He was every little girl's dream of a grandfather and I think his stubborness was his blessing given to me from birth! GGG died the night before my wedding - surrounded by most of his loved ones and with as little fuss and drama that he could've hoped for.

He was not a demonstrative man - and my mother his only daughter, who loved him beyond words, told me that he chose to die at my wedding - to ensure that the focus would not be on him and that he knew I would be strong enough to deal with having such a tragic event take place at such a joyful celebration. He was almost right - while I was not strong enough to have gone through with my wedding regardless - my mother was. She was a rock, unbelievably gracious in her grieving and stood up and told all our wedding guests that there would come a time to mourn the loss of her precious father but that today - on her daughter's wedding day - we would celebrate his LIFE! and we did...........it was a fantastic day .........it was special and poignant and bittersweet.........and it was the day that I cemented my love for my husband ...........and my mother.

Random Beginnings....

Nic & I met in London through a very important mutual friend, Claire.....I could never do justice to explain my relationship with Claire - there is a photo in my house of her and I at the Nottinghill Carnival - with springy headbands on and whistles in our mouths, having a ball! The picture always makes me smile as it is the epitome of my time in London and how much joy Claire brings to my life.........but I digress, there will be lots more tales of the antics of C&C........

Claire had travelled through Europe with Nic and they had become good friends. It has always amazed me that Nic and I (both S. African) met through Claire (another S.African) who needed travelling companions through Europe and posted a message at the OVC in Earls Court and got responses from 4 random S. Africans........

Claire and I met while working as temp staff at JPMorgan in London and after eyeing each other out for the first day or two became firm, shopping, working, partying soulmates. In one of our first conversations, Claire mentioned Nic and how she thought we'd hit it off but since I was dating someone else, I never paid much attention to the name. But after a failed planned meeting (where Nic met someone at a bar and didn't pitch for dinner!!!!) he appeared one random day on our doorstep and has frankly never left since!

In my mind, I can still picture seeing him for the first time and no matter how I detest the phrase love at first sight - I think my feelings for Nic just caught me by suprise in that first instant. It was a fait accompli - I just knew he was for me and I didn't fight the feeling. Little did I know what a journey we would have together, but I could not have chosen a more solid, loving, generous, honest, funny man to be by my side and I thank God every day that he appeared on our doorstep that day......

P.S in return, we thanked Claire by introducing her to her husband, Russell. Another random meeting that grew into love.

Journey's End

Welcome to the Fertilitree Blog.....finally!

I get asked every day by all the wonderful people who visit our store, how did you start this business? what is your story? what can you tell us that is any different to everyone else's journey......?? So hence the blog. I hope that as you read about our journey to parenthood - which has often been a bumpy ride, you might find hope through our experiences and blessings. Join us - feel free to comment and add your thoughts - there is never too much information for an Infertile

In a way, this picture of the first few precious seconds of Guy's life is our Journey's End, but allow me to go back to the beginning....where it ALSO all started with Nic and I clutching each other's hand......Welcome to our first blog post